And I have been lectured to, as a friend, to get a focus… some read this blog (Ken!), and they do not see what I am really doing to…telling me to focus and MAKE MONEY… and see me losing focus and direction.

But I will be honest, a lot of business developments and revalations have happened in just over a week being in America….and they are in China….and when I get back and firm them up, I will update everyone.

Last year I was searching a lot more than this year, this year I am committed to coming back to China, committed to ecommerce

Its really sad to talk to so many of my friends who are laid off, getting laid off, afraid to lose their jobs. The feeling of helplessness…

So many mixed feelings….living away from friends and family, growing away from one another, people focusing on different things…..

Its been emotional, and like many of my expats (people living “overseas” from their home country) that this feeling is normal…..but I have pivoted to realize the opportunities and the future is in China and Asia….and that is where I will stay.

As I talk to my American friends as about the rapid growth of China, the new subway lines being built, the buildings coming up, the inflation, the job opportunities….

But again, I think back to history, that some people have to be willing to make changes to build opportunity, to build a business…

I just cannot say I see business opportunity by staying in USA. In a way, I wish I could…

I wish my mom didn’t cry to me over the phone asking why I need to be in China in order to get opportunities…

those are the hard phone calls to make.

I think about how my grandfather must have felt when he left Italy to work in New york, to earn money for him and his current family and his future family with my grandmother and my father, uncle and aunt….

I wish I knew my grandfather on my father’s side…

My uncle Bill even comments this blog, and says how sad it is in America currently…how he is on a fixed income and inflation is growing, etc etc….(((update))) My uncle Bill was born in the Bronx, NY by my grandmother who came from Russia through Harbin, China….she also came to America for a better opportunity than the country she grew up in.

I think my grandfather Gelindo Michelini would know how I feel now…..(my grandfather came from Italy to NYC and motivates me). Sadly I never got to meet him…but he was an entrepeneur who left Italy to build his future and business in New York….

and this trip to USA has made it clear, I belong in China….

and during this trip, other Americans have approached me wanting to come to China too, and I’m working on that too.

Incoming search terms:

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So I’ve left Shenzhen…after rushing around like a madman to get last minute meetings and sharing information about startups meetings while I’m gone. Spent the day and night in Hong Kong meeting friends like Gary and Leon, saw Jon at Boot.hk which is under renovations….just intense quick meetings with others….getting ideas of what I can pitch to my American friends when I arrive back stateside.

I still love this chaos, but I am much more prepared and aware for this trip than last year….for one I am much more focused and clear on my agenda….I have been working harder to confirm exact meeting times and places rather than “I”ll contact you when I’m in town”. Also I know I’m going to be focusing on ecommerce between USA and China.

And also I’ve been even more open on my blog . getting emails from readers I have never met that want to meet me when I’m in a specific city on a specific date. Emails like the below:

Hey Bud!

Read your blog today!!! Looks great and I really wishing I can come
out and join up with you in China at some point. Looks like we’ll
only be chilling the weekend of Jules’ weekend per your schedule.
What’s your plan Sunday?

LA sept 21-23,
NYC/NJ Sept 24-Oct 2,
Florida Oct 2 – 8,
San Fran Oct 9-12
then back to China

Any chance you’ll be back in December? I’ve booked 8 nights in the
Keys through new years! You should come out and party with me and
Shanthi! I’m going to ask them this Friday (I
think?).

Call/Text me when you get on the flight Friday night so I can track
your flight.

T

So here is the more detailed agenda now, from the more basic on a couple months ago just explaining the *** flight to USA being booked **

Wed, Sept 21 – Land in Los Angeles (LAX) in the evening, meet with ecommerce warehouses, distributors, alliances…..discuss a new China / USA ecommerce internship program exchange…and investigate opening a USA sales and business development office.

Friday Sept 23 – red eye flight from LAX to Newark (EWR) (feel like I’m in that song by Everlast…) … depart

Saturday Sept 24 - the red eye arrives in Newark around 7am, Tayan is picking me up, and we have to meet Jules at noon for the WEDDING party photos. Hopefully my Tuxedo is ready – I had to fax my measurements over to the tux shop.

All day wedding with Jules and my Stevens Tech buds, not sure where I’m staying I didn’t get a hotel room yet

Sunday Sept 25 – probably spend more time with Julian and my friends there, maybe go to Hoboken, NJ in the afternoon

Monday, Sept 26 – visit my alumni Stevens Tech (www.stevens.edu) see friends and professors there.

Visit New Work City coworking space, also hope to see loose cubes in brooklyn. Meet a distributor in Bronx, NY. Meet Shipwire about ecommerce solutions.

Thurs, Sept 29 – speak at Stevens Tech to the “Technogenesis” class about Chinese business, and how selling in China is different from selling in USA.

Saturday, Oct 1 – hope to get up to connecticut for a day or two, catch up with my hometown crew from Hartford and New Britain!

Monday, Oct 3 – fly to Florida, meet my parents. During Florida trip, visit some distributors, possible tequila brand that wants to sell in Asia / China, do some banking and company admin (my USA company, shadstone associates, inc is registered in florida)

Saturday Oct 8 – basically a full day of travel… fly florida to jfk , train to newark, fly newark to LA.

end in LAX at about 8pm saturday night local time….deciding to stay in LA or …. (see below)

Sunday Oct 9 – not sure, would love to get to San Diego to see Piotr and his new baby. my flight is out of San Francisco on Oct 12….have some meetings planned there, and also hoping to get to Seattle to meet Gillian from SEOmoz.org

Spend some time in Silicon Valley

Wednesday, Oct 12 – fly San Francisco to connect in Beijing and land in Hong Kong.

Thurs Oct 13 – Probably stay in Hong Kong for the day, maybe 1 night….meet up Gary and give out some gifts, podcast kit!

Oct 14 – back to work in Shenzhen!

Its 430am right now, I’m working with USA phone calls and emails trying to keep things aligned.

After about an hour bus ride, I arrived to meet the geekcook crew, we drove to their office and warehouse to finalize which geekcook products to first enter usa market and ship to the LA, USA warehouse. It was good to meet his staff, it was also interesting to note that his mom and dad were also contributing to the business, as well as friends and coworkers and business partner’s wife and children on the scene. Its like a big family, not just a company. He knows from my blog that I have a mom, dad, and sister in my immediate family so he let me choose some gifts for each of them to take back on my USA trip. I told him I’ll take a group photo of them each wearing the t-shirts..

yes, we are digital geeks…haha.

We then went walked to a street bbq that Friday night, David is pushing me to learn Chinese more! and that once I am better at Chinese he can offer me a lot more opportunity…and there will be big long term benefits to me for dedicating and investing time in Chinese.

We both agree and understand the political and cultural differences between USA and China….and we both agree that the future of the world will continue to be based on these 2 superpowers bridging their relationship and business networks….. always fun discussions.

Headed back around 1am to sleep at the company dormitory and wakeup bright and early saturday morning, 8 am! There office and dormitory is on a government industrial park focusing on design and brands. David tells me a couple years ago it was a factory for Altec Lansing speakers. Now the current rich Chinese government is giving very low rent to companies like David (geekcook) to build up their own brand and marketing and distribution.

Saturday the fun began right away. I saw that we would be going to a water park on the outskirts of Guangzhou city, called Da Feng Men which would be a mix of hiking to the river dock and then rafting down the river.

I got to spend time with some of the children, which were very jolly and curious – healthy kids. One of them, Leo, first talked about the sept 11 tragedy when he heard I was from USA. Made me wonder how much its talked about in Chinese school.

I wasn’t advised/allowed to take my laptop with me….never got a clear answer but it would have been difficult to carry and store anyway….but I’m so addicted….it was a necessary break. And my huawei android tablet is giving me so many problems, so gmail sync issue and I couldn’t check emails. But maybe this was a needed problem, to help me get away.

I’m blogging a bunch of photos from the hike….didn’t get to take pics in the river….too wet! It was a pretty refreshing and exhausting day…but being a Saturday the line was soo long, maybe 1 hour wait, standing only.

We spent the night, about 8 of us, in a small village outside of Guangzhou called Zheng Guo, and being a foursquare addict, I couldn’t find any locations at all in the whole village….David helped me add one at the street bbq. The amazing thing about China, even after living here 4 years and being open to trying any food, there is still aways some crazy new food dish that I haven’t heard of or eaten. This time it was duck mouth…..like strips of the beak chopped up. Rather tough, but did have a ok taste. David also mentioned he was 22 years old and had caught a live snake in the woods and cooked it that night and ate it….crazy.

We rented rooms at a farmer’s inn….not a hotel, but really a home owned by a farmer and he has the 2nd and 3rd floor of his home setup as a hostel / budget inn. One bathroom on the floor, 3 rooms, and a common family room. Very relaxed….the whole village was maybe 3 blocks wide, right along side a freshwater lake. Some took a night swim, but I just relaxed and breathed the fresh air….hadn’t had fresh air like that in a while living in this big metropolis….

Today (Sunday) we woke up early (again) and used our own inflatable rafts and went up and down the river a few hours….wish my Tablet hadn’t been giving me problems or I’d have more photos.

We had a nice lunch today, alongside a massive wedding reception…I also get tons of stares being the only foreigner all weekend, but I’m used to it, and also I agree with others, Chinese people are nice, they are just curious about foreigners.

I hope to grow my cooperation with geekcook “family”, they really are a modern and young Chinese company, building a brand, and also standing for something in China. They just wished me well on my bus trip back to Shenzhen and also my USA trip. David tells me to say hi to Obama for him. hah.

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But it did come at a rough time, as I outlined the world felt like it came crashing down as I’ve been overextending myself with the startup and coworking community building in Shenzhen, Marie having an early baby delivery, and so many other changes in warehouses in USA and China…..staff moves….Maybe I should have told Ish I couldn’t make it anymore, but I forced myself to make it work and spend some time with my old college friend and fraternity brother (Delta Tau Delta!!)

So here is the main point of this blog….The amazing thing is that he is SELLING REAL ESTATE TO ASIANS LIKE CRAZY. Really top notch high end New York, New Jersey prime real estate. So his firm hired a marketing and investment agency that specializes in helping foreigner real estate companies sell in China and Asia. He was in Hong Kong for the weekend to exhibit his building, 77 Hudson, to investors and potential buyers.

And its cheaper than Hong Kong, by far! And Chinese are buying up USA real estate because they believe its so low, it has nowhere to go but up!

I was talking to a real estate consultant there, Paul, and he mentioned to me that Chinese also want to get their money out of China….that they make quick money through government connections, and then need to get the money out of the Chinese circulation. He gave me a horrible story about a home builder and developer in southern China that was making multi millions developing land and buildings in a certain city…but when the government changed, he lost everything…..

So Chinese also trust American real estate as a safer investment that has little or no political risk, and they never invest in just cash, Chinese like to buy hard assets and real estate fits the bill.

They can even finance the Asian buyers with Hong Kong mortgages for these USA real estate investments….truly amazing. And the place was buzzing with buyers, sitting down at various bargaining tables discussing the 2 bedroom suite with a home office, or just get the 3 bedroom suite.

It really is true, America will be owned by Asians soon enough, both in debt and literally in the real estate assets.

It was great to see Ish, learn about all of this real estate selling spree in Asia…and realize again that I made the right move coming to China and Asia back in 2007.

But I’m a human being. I try to openly delegate, directly connect people in the organization…to not be the piece of the puzzle that if I get sick the pyramid crumbles…but still, such a small business the people running the business are the most valuable assets.

And running around like a madman in Philippines….delayed flights, boats not going for days on end…..hours of sitting in a taxi in metro manila during traffic. I have definitely gotten way more patient since coming to Asia from America….but even still, my nerves still get shocked with inefficiency in communication systems and transportation chaos.

Sadly, most people never see both sides…I do remember being that frustrated American businessman never having come to China or other parts of Asia. Its a developing economy, constant contruction, such rapid growth in infrastructure that there is downtime. Or there is such a glut of people who have no motivation to work to improve the system. It will take the current youth in these countries to have the global exposure and mindset to better develop these systems…the internet and communication platforms will better expose cultures.

Again, I am just more aware and appreciative of the daily frustrations in the Philippines – brownouts, high electricity costs, massive traffic in Manila, inefficient public transportation, taxi hustlers, it wears on people and in a way creates and environment where the harder you work, the harder it is to maintain, the forces are against you.

I’m saying this as I charge my mobile phone in restaurants while eating dinner, struggling to catch a wifi connection in a free wifi zone (the signal is there, but connection just doesnt work….), and sitting in traffic tweeting from my mobile phone. If you stress about it, you will get an ulser…

Thursday night I will be back in Hong Kong, where the internet is fast, electricity is abundant, and transportation systems are efficient.

Location still matters, and after this holiday I am ready to really get down to business!

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Full day of traveling on Saturday:

• 6:30am wake up in Muelle pier, Puerto Galera. Boat leaves ON time 7am, but not a direct boat, it has to make a stop at Sabang pier before
• Arrive in Batangas port 9am, trying to catch a 12:20pm departure Manila to Boracay, In Batangas, try to save time to get a taxi, but so many hustlers changing prices and terms….James, Chris, and I along with Damian (who missed his Bangkok flight already) take the bus. But 2 buses are there, wouldn’t tell us which one was leaving first, but find the bus with more locals and more full and jump on that one. Luckily it was right, and we left after 5 minutes.
• While on the bus, get a call from MikeMo that the 12:20 flight to Boracay has been CANCELLED and they have some other flights available later in the afternoon, at least I don’t have to rush to the airport now, as I have been delayed in Puerto Galera for 2 nights already.
• Arriving at the closest bus stop to the airport, part ways with Damian who is staying in downtown Manila overnight, look to take a taxi to the airport….but the taxi’s refuse to use a meter, and tell us to cross the overpass of the highway in Manila to catch the taxis that will use a meter. James has a lot of luggage to lug around and didn’t realize this wasn’t a “5 star resort vacation”. I’ve learned to travel light and backpack only. Find a meter taxi and head to the airport. Meter only ran up to 60 peso….taxi driver (taxis in Manila philippines I blog about here). Its getting better though
• Arrive at airport, Chris didn’t have a flight booked yet (his mobile data plan hadn’t been working for hours to book online. I am getting phone calls from MikeMo and Attila about flight times, one saying 3pm is available, other saying 3pm is fully booked and move to 3:45pm. I’m flexible, but Chris is booking his flight and wants to fly together….after a series of calls, its determined 3:45 is the flight we will use, and all 4 of us are confirmed.
• Take free shuttle van to the casino near the airport. Chris had to pay an extra thousand or so because he booked his flight in person (his globe mobile data wasn’t working!) so he had to “win it back at the casino”. I’m a watcher not a player, spent about an hour there. Had some japanese fusion lunch, then head back to the airport to catch the 3:45.
• Taxi back t the airport (across the street) in terminal 3…..of course they don’t want to use the meter, asking for 100 peso…churn through a couple taxi, and finally get a taxi that will take us over on the meter….60 peso.
• Go through security, no problems, MikeMo already had our seats reserved and was waiting for us. I don’t need my passport for domestic flights, so was able to use my American driver’s license to get through checkin.
• The 4 of us finally all meetup, ready to start a vacation, “hangover movie” style, in Boracay, Philippines! All of a sudden, announcement – FLIGHT IS CANCELLED! We have to wait in line…..Turns out we cannot fly to the Boracay airport directly, but have to catch a 5:45pm flight to Kalibo airport instead and take a bus to Boracay…..or wait til tomorrow…..so we have no choice, we want to get to Boracay for Saturday night, and we receive free travel coupons for future domestic flights…..sigh….we just want to get on with our vacation!
• Fly to Kalibo on time, and arrive around 7pm….take a 7:30pm bus to Boracay port….that is paid for by Cebu Pacific Air. A very windy rural road up hills, side to side….ran over a dog during the trip….at least we had some San Miguel Light beers we picked up at the airport to hold us over.
• Arrive at the port, take a boat across the port to Boracay island….around 9pm at this time.
• Finally, after arriving at Boracay island, catch a tricycle from Section 3 to Section 1 of the island….catching sites of all the clubs, bars, beaches, and adventure options for this crazy weekend ahead. Checkin to hotel approximately 10pm

So that covers it – boat, attempted taxi, bus, taxi, shuttle bus, taxi, plane, bus, boat, tricyle…..9 methods of transportation and 15 hours of travel time…..yes, it is Typhoon season so I shouldn’t attempt this vacation travel anyway….but it was exhausting.

BUT IT WAS WORTH IT! Used every minute we could to drink, eat, swim, and suck in the Boracay aura. Unfortunately (or fortunately on behalf of the “vacation” part) the hotel only had wifi in the lobby (not even cable internet in the room), so I was not able to do more then reply to emergency emails…..forcing me to enjoy my vacation. (sure I was still tweeting on twitter and checking in on foursquare, but that is my kinda fun!)

Supposed to fly out of Boracay to Manila yesterday (Monday) afternoon, but received a phone call from Cebu Pacific that the flight has been cancelled….and MikeMo is able to get one seat on a later flight that day, but there were not enough flights for all of us….so the three other dudes Chris, Attila, and me had to get a 2pm flight the next day (Tuesday)…..aiya……

But again, delays may be for a reason, and we lived it up on the extra day in Boracay. I had to cancel / reschedule a few phone meetings to Wednesday….and stressing a bit more that more email and work is piling up…..but during the trip met the general manager of a resort here, Discovery, and he and his friends took good care of us, being hospitable filipinos as they explained it. Spent the afternoon eating and hanging by the poolside there.

We were invited to his villa in the mountainside where there is an infite pool, private BBQ cook, DJ, totally awesome place….burgers, beers, and a swimming pool overlooking the Boracay beach….not sure how vacation could be better…

Today (Tuesday) I’m writing this from the plane ride back to Manila….only half capacity on this propeller plane because they say the weight limit is tighter due to the high winds recently…..bumping off many people from the flight, like a group of 20 Chinese tourists from Shanghai. They were so angry…..but luckily we were able to be squeezed onto the flight and should land in Manila later this evening.

It is a bit scary here taking off on the runway….thinking it wouldn’t be that strange the plane couldn’t take off and crash….made me think, if I were to die…I would not regret living my life each day. Maximizing my life and waking up each day looking in the mirror to make sure I am doing things I am excited about and passionate about.

But this trip has been exhausting….so many cancelled / rescheduled flights and meetings….its allowing me to “let go” a bit more and learn to relax and not stress about the things I cannot control.

Definitely a vacation I needed….I think I’m ready to work like a maniac again! Lets rock!

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Stephen is a cool guy from Korea, here in Hong Kong to market and expand the amount of hosts (available rooms to rent) in Hong Kong. I just listed my Hong Kong apartment to test it out. This is not like couchsurfing but instead you get paid for renting out your space.

I have attended some couchsurfing meetups in Hong Kong, they have weekly meetings on Thursdays in Lan Kwai Fong of Central. I have heard many of the CS’ers complain how hard it is for them to find couches in Hong Kong.

My friend Philip Tang has listed up his place in Hong Kong island, and explains he gets bombarded with couch surf requests there. And his profile is barely even filled out! People are just desparate.

I listed my Couchsurfing profile offering dorm in the Dongguan ecommerce center but for some reason, people don’t read that, and instead I’m getting requests regularly asking (begging) to stay at my place in Hong Kong (for free!). I don’t have an extra bed, nor a couch….its just a floor. Literally. I have had one friend take me up on the offer and do it….but I think he secretly regretted that decision!

The situation in Hong Kong, its interesting ….real estate is the highest in the world these days….after college graduation, many Hong Kong locals still live at home, to save money from renting an apartment and they cannot afford the down payment on a condo. Its just extreme speculation here….I personally cannot imagine housing prices to continue to climb higher.

Stephen was asked by a few people how to insure that people are safe renting out their place, he answered the following:

• Facebook profile connect – Facebook is like our social security ID card and this is another example of how.
• They have the surfer’s payment information on file – if it really gets that bad, they will look into the payment details and track the person down.
• Wimpu will back up, to a point. Stephen mentioned that there have been issues where the hosts of the places complained something didn’t work so well afterwards, or other issues about details, and Wimpu backed them up.

Its been something I’m promoting go couchsurfing this summer and I think it opens people’s mind to meet new people, visit new places, explore cultures…..without wasting too much money on hotels and focusing more on life. With less excuses that we can’t afford to travel, or don’t have time, blah blah.

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Recently got an email about a new article written about why you should couchsurf this summer, thought it was good enough to share here today:

We would love to share with you an article that we just posted on our own blog! (10 Reasons to Consider Couchsurfing this Summer) is linked below and could be a fun way to share this announcement with your readers.

(http://www.bestcollegesonline.net/blog/2011/10-reasons-to-consider-couchsurfing-this-summer/)

It has been a sincere pleasure to read your great content.

Can’t really tell if this is some “SEO spam email” but heck, it gives me a good topic to blog about.

Even my good friends think couchsurfing is crazy and maybe a bit dangerous. But I get to know people so much more when couchsurfing! Think about it, the most bonding time to get to know people is in the evening, to learn the culture, how they live, their habits, etc. I have learned so much more about different cultures and life perspectives couch surfing.

So for those of you wondering………Its not just a way for cheap travel!, but instead really getting into a culture. Especially when traveling internationally. I have learned so much about Chinese and Philippines lifestyle by living in their home. By living like a local. I know its crazy, but I prefer it over a hotel! I get a connection with the family, the neighbors. See life truly from their angle. Whereas if I were staying in a hotel, Sure I would tour the city with them, visit company offices, have dinner. But for the most part, dinner is over, depending on the people you’re with you’ll go to a bar, or a cafe, etc. Chit chat….but then you separate at night, you stay in your nice hotel, they drive/taxi back to their home.

I think at that critical moment, a lot of experience and culture and connection is LOST.

I know, hosting a couchsurfer is much more difficult than hosting a friend visiting and staying at a hotel. As a host, sure we want some time off talking to people, explaining things, making sure they are comfortable, etc. Its also maybe a bit invading, the couchsurfer is inside your home, using your bathroom things, going in your fridge, etc etc.

Maybe Americans feel more strange than say Europeans. I really think it comes down to culture. Americans are brought up to OWN things take possession, ownership – THIS IS MINE. Where I feel European or most other cultures learn to share and experience other things and people.

Yes, this sounds kind of “hippy” lifestyle, and it is. But again, its also environmental and GREEN. Share instead of your have own things and place to stay, i have my own things and place to stay. Because that means the world has to manufacture and create MORE STUFF (as George Carlin says so well) We have to learn to consume less.

Again, I know its hard for people to change their mindset and lifestyle. But couchsurfing, minimalism, traveling, social and community is a great way to learn culture, be environmentally responsible, and focusing on life instead of numbers in your bank account.

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Interesting way for me to spend my Easter holiday!

For those curious, as far as how these countries celebrate Easter: In Hong Kong, they do have both Friday and Monday off, while in America, there isn’t any official weekday off, simply celebrated on Sunday. In Mainland China, its not recognized at all, and its business as usual.

But in Hong Kong, I see no signs of the Easter bunny, but while walking around this Saturday afternoon with Leon, I did bump into some sales girls dressed up in bunny suits, so today’s blog photo is rather humorous to me.

Religion has always been strange to me, my father is Baptist and my mother Roman Catholic. I was going to Baptist Church with the family up until I was about 11 or 12 years old….and I remember a fight in the family home about my mom wanting me and my sister to be Catholic and get baptized sooner (in Catholic Christianity, you’re baptized as a child, but Baptists they wait until the teenage years). So I converted from Baptist to Catholic when I was around 12 years old…had a lot of catch up CCD Catholic classes, meetings with the Roman Catholic priest, and was quickly baptized to catch up with the other Catholics in the community.

As I got older, I think during high school years, I attended Church less and less. In college, freshman year I did find a local Catholic Church in Hoboken, New Jersey, but I only went for a few Sunday masses before getting wrapped up in college life.

Moving to China….well it makes it much more difficult. I have ran into some Christian communities in Shenzhen, China, but it seems underground. I am not familiar with how Churches are treated in China, but I cannot imagine the government likes them.

When I spend time in the Philippines, I am surrounded much more by Christianity. The team of workers there now are busy this whole week for Holy traditions, and its been rather hard to work with them. Filipinos definitely are very strict in their Christian beliefs, I think mostly influenced during the time it was rules by the Spaniards.

Life in Asia…again, during each holiday it make me miss my family and my home. I remember taking a trip to my grandparent’s house after Easter Sunday mass and having easter baskets waiting. The hollow chocolate bunnies, the cadburry eggs, and those marshmallow sticky bunnies. But even being back in America, life is different now then it was when I was a child anyway.

Happy Easter to all, I hope the Easter Bunny left a nice big basket of treats for you. haha.

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Its just becoming more clear…I want to develop social media, communities, I get the most fulfillment from that. I think it is the most difficult, and its also the best way for me to utilize the years I have struggled in China business….its the connections and the trust I have built in the meantime. Sure I may have made some mistakes, some people didn’t agree with me, and I didn’t agree with them, but that is life.

So many people see me as a business consultant. My Hong Kong accountant invited me to be an advisor on their accountant association, I met with him and his partner last week. I’ll have to make some presentations about USA business, and they have a decent amount of members in the UK. More on that later as I confirm it and learn more myself. But it just feels so rewarding to be asked to be part of these clubs….and I have no problem connecting more people once I get familiar.

Just as an example of how I am getting more equipped for international business…I am typing this blog at 4:53pm on Sunday, awaiting the 5:50pm train from Hong Kong to Guangzhou. I’m in the waiting queue, and holding my laptop against my thigh to type it as I’m standing up. (I try to blog from my tablet, but the touch screen just doesn’t work for long passages, at least not for me).

I have 2 3G wifi hotspots one for Hong Kong and China, a tablet for China (its also a phone), an android phone for Hong Kong, emergency power packs (these train stations NEVER have electricity power outlets!!!!!!) so many wires and adapters for different power outlets…I’m a walking office.

So I have 3 choices:

1. I can complain and cry about it – Some people may feel this is what this blog is about, my crying and complaining about my personal hardships in dealing with a small business overseas in China / Asia. Well, maybe it does help me to “talk outloud” and share my feelings…its soothing in its own sick way. Come on, what do people like to write about, and read about…its problems, struggles, passionate fighting for something, a cause.
2. I can change it – I could say “I don’t want to do this anymore”, go back to get a dayjob in America…I see this is giving up, and I have survived this far. Not something I can accept. We only have one life to live, if anything I hope to write a book about this, its definitely been an adventure.
3. I can deal with it – I think after returning to Asia late last year…taking the return ticket to Hong Kong I knew in the back of my head I wouldn’t be coming back to America so soon. Sure, I thought to myself I can always come back to America if I don’t feel right coming to Asia again…but the opportunities are in China. Things are growing, things are happening here….its just hard to partake in it as a foreigner….but I will not give up.

So as I wait in the Hung Hom Hong Kong train station to go to Guangzhou, I just realize that I have to accept the fact that….things will forever be changing, I cannot fully control, and I just have to accept it and make it work.

Another post coming soon comparing myself a few years ago to now.

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The trip is about 7 hours by car, and I have 3 companions with me from the five islands ecommerce center, as there is also a Tao Bao (chinese ebay) trade fair at the same expo that they are attending.

I do miss road trips…..as some said to me as I was planning for this roadtrip that the 7 hours is nothing for an American…..Americans drive everywhere all the time, and the country is so big, right?

That is something I have to pretty much agree with, what are the choices in USA? I have explained my horrible bus ride in USA late last year…..America just doesn’t have good infrastructure for transportation. Buses are horrible, and scary in America. You can fly, but then you still normally have to drive quite a ways once you arrive in the airport as most cities are so spread out. So then you’ll have to rent a car, or pay an expensive taxi.

I lived in San Diego for quite a few months with my good friend Piotr in summer 2007, and I tried so hard to not rent a car, but it really set me back…..whereas in China, I can get around pretty much no problem without a car in most major cities…so many taxi, trains, subways, and BUS network is extensive.

Its been such a long time for a roadtrip, may as well try one along the coast in China….the sites are pretty awesome once you get outside of the densely populated cities in China.

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Finally budgeting some time to watch this AWESOME TED video my friend Josh Whiting sent over to me – The power of vulnerability presentation by Brene Brown.  I don’t know about you, but I prefer to read something than to watch something….I wrote down notes as I watched it – I do recommend you watching it as well, but here I kind of hit the big points that stuck in my mind.

What is courage?  Courage got blended up with bravery, but Brene says the root meaning of courage is to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart, not to be ashamed of who we are and being open.

So…..

Courage is to accept we are imperfect.  To realize we are not perfect.  To still live our lives.

Compassion to be kind to ourselves first, then to others

Connection – as the result of authenticity, let go of who they thought they should be, and be who they really are.

Vulnerability is beautiful, willingness to say i love you first, without guarantees, willingness to invest in a relationship that may or may not work out.

So what makes you feel vulnerable……..she asked on facebook and twitter and got over 150 responses, such as

• having to ask husband for help
• being turned down
• having to ask someone for something
• laying people off

So, how do we deal?  …..we numb vulnerability……..but you cannot selectively numb emotions. We can’t just have a beer and make the bad emotions go away. Take a pill, smoke a cigarette, eat some chocolate.

so when we numb those bad feelings – we also numb joy, we numb happiness and then we feel MISERABLE. We then drink another beer to try to feel better.

So why do we numb?

we make everything that is uncertain to certainty. I’m right, you’re wrong, shut up. The more afraid we are, the more vulnerable we are, then the viscous cycle repeats

Politics now has just become blame. People say blame is interpreted as a way to discharge pain and discomfort.

Then we pass this to our children. Since we, as adults grown up, are not perfect, but now know how to be perfect – our children —-> They will be perfect, they will represent everything we wished we achieved in our lifetime, will pass down to our seeds.  But we have to let our children know they ARE NOT PERFECT.  And the goal is not to be perfect, but to love YOUSELF for who you are, and love others for who they are.

Then she goes on to say that we pretend what we do ourselves does not affect other people. IT DOES. People and companies just need to be authentic and real!  We all live in the same planet, and the actions by us as individuals and as companies affects everyone around us, every day.  Words hurt!

JUST LET OURSELVES BE SEEN. Let people see who we are, love with our whole heart, without expecting people to love you back.  I think, personally, by having this blog and letting my feelings out publicly, I feel more confident and more connected…it really has changed me as a person.

Be passionate. Be grateful. Realize feeling vulnerable is part of being a human being and that we need to accept who we are, and be kinder and gentler to ourselves and the people around us.

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It’s strange, to me and to my friends, that I have not earlier been involved in couchsurfing websites, making my couchsurfing.org profile  more complete lately.  I have been “couchsurfing” for almost as long as I have been traveling, depending on how you define it.  And this is why I love twitter and blogging and social media, because you can more closely connect with people as  you travel, meet them before you even go to the destination, and more exponentially expand your network!

But this “couchsurfing idea” start partly off the idea that I didn’t want to wait for groups of my friends  to travel together, as so many times in college we would push friends to travel, and normally people would back out as it got closer and the trip would be cancelled.  So I started traveling solo.

My fraternity network – I was one of those fraternity guys who actually utililzed the national network of university chapters, visiting the Delta Tau Delta chapters in Boston, Iowa, West Virginia, Mississippi, and Louisiana (maybe more but I forget) throughout my college career.  A few cases below:

Lake George, Upstate New york, Summer 2001 – A fraternity brother in my Stevens Tech chapter, Rich Hattenbach, had his birthday one summer weekend night in 2001, and wanted to get up to Lake George to his friend’s summer home, but didn’t have a ride. That summer I had my pickup truck down in New Jersey (from Connecticut) as I had to commute to work at AT&T in Staten Island, New York each day.  He pleaded me to go, saying I could stay over his friend’s summer home too and ride their boat and cliff jump, water ski, and party.  So later that Friday night, him, Frank, and I crammed into my pickup and took the 8ish hour drive up to upstate NY and “couchsurfed”.

Los Angeles National Fraternity Conference, 2002 – I was of the few fraternity brothers in my university chapter to get involved with national conferences and leadership training, but I think it was a big part of my personal development and networking expansion.  The national conferences were every 2 years I went to the 2000 one in Minneapolis staying with my chapter brothers in hotel rooms.  But in the 2002 conference was in LA, so I came a few days earlier and met up with other fraternity brothers from other chapters – specifically the brothers from Georgia Tech, such as Scott Taylor.  I met him at a leadership training week long program in West Virginia, as well as a good bunch of future leaders.  He and I were both going to the national conference in LA, so we thought we’d head down to San Diego and Tijuana, Mexico for a few days before the conference started.  I also met his chapter brothers, about 4 other guys, and we had an awesome few days.  I remember his aunt had a house in San Diego, and let us crash in the guest house after our wild partying.  I think I can define this as one of the first “couchsurfing” experiences where I really didn’t know anyone except Scott who I had met a year ago at a conference.

Mardi Gras 2003 – I went to New Orleans solo in spring 2003, as my friends and I always wanted to go.  I knew a fraternity brother, Danile Pocase, also who I met at the leadership academy in West Virginia, that was attending the University of Southern Mississippi and was about a hour drive (I believe) from Tulane University in New Orleans where he knew brothers in that chapter.  But he couldn’t go, so other brothers in his Sourthern Miss chapter were also curious to go to Mardi Gras and drove me with them to visit the Tulane chapter for a party.  We knew none of the brothers in Tulane, and really utilized the “hey, I’m a delt brother in another chapter” and got into the party.  The first night I stayed on the couch in the brother’s room (living room) but I met a cool guy there who had an off-campus apartment (4 bedroom) that was also closer to the Mardi Gras celebration and invited me to crash his couch.  Spent a week  there, and then returned to New Jersey.  Met so many people there, and still have contact with a bunch (thanks to facebook, linkedin I have re-connected with others too).

Backpacking in Europe Summer 2003 – This trip I won a scholarship from the National Italian American Society for a “cultural submersion” program they sponsored each summer to have Italian American university students go to Italy and experience and connect with their culture in the “motherland”.  It was a 2 week (or 10 day?) trip and was awesome as there were 2 people from each state attending, and I made contacts all across America, as well as in Italy.  But I was able to extend my return ticket a couple weeks and backpacked on my own further into Italy.  Crashed at my cousins house in Trento, Italy, also meeting various backpackers in hostels, sharing apartments in Nice, France – really was exposed to people of all kinds of cultures and backgrounds…and really expanded my mind.  Also, note that this backpacking  trip was supposed to be with my college friends, but all backed out for different reasons, so I decided to solo.  So glad I did still go.

Cross Country roadtrip summer 2003 – Was supposed to be my hometown friends trip, but only Scott Katin and I went.  He had his chevy s10 pickup and he drove from Connecticut to Manhattan NYC to pick me up, and drove all the way to San Diego California and back…..sometimes crashing at friend’s couches along the way, some hotels, and sometimes camping.  Amazing trip I will never forget, and actually a lot of the photos he took are used on my site still!.

I did some Jamaica trip in summer 2003 with  Tayan, but stayed in hotels, I went to London for a new job training for Deutsche Bank, but they put me in corporate apartments.  Still, while it may not be “couchsurfing” its still traveling and networking, experiencing cultures and perspectives. These trips defined me before I started my corporate life at Deutsche bank from fall 2003 to spring 2007.

2008 to 2009 was a little bit of that, but mostly I was stationed in Shenzhen, China opening my office and starting my China sourcing company..that I started to realize I really belonged more to the internet world, and fixed offices were not for me.

Almost 30 years old now, and still finding out about myself.  Takes time, and hopefully all of us in life spend  time exploring who we really are.

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Really, if this was USA, the geographical distance between these places is similar to going from south florida to Puerto rico…..except there are 3 currencies and 3 languages and 3 borders!

I think this is a pretty good correlation of geographical distances, except that hong kong / south china is separated by a body of water, where cities in Florida aren’t. But the temperatures are similar, and the flight from south florida to Puerto Rico is about the same as China/Hong Kong to Philippines.

So while my friends back home think I am traveling like crazy….really it’s a 2 hour flight from Hong Kong to Manila, flight costs approx. $200usd round trip…its just a different country!

It would be more traveling if I were in USA, flying from San Franscico to New York – as that is a 5 (?) hour plane ride and I believe costs around $400usd round trip.

Just want to blog about this to make my friends back home realize the geographical distance between these places, as they see me traveling so much….

Maybe this is a reason USA became such an economical superpower…..once you’re inside the country, its easy and fast to do business as there is less “transition time” for currency exchange, language translation, border crossing.

Really, I wonder how much of my brain and lifetime is spent traveling through borders and in transport…..

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Foreigners think I’m crazy, and even local Filipinos think I’m insane….but I take local transportation. I have been here since Friday and I still have not taken a single taxi yet this trip. They are hard to deal with for the most part, but also…its the “easy” way. I want to learn the local way. I want to feel how it is to live daily life in the Philippines.

And life is HARD here!! I do see some beautiful malls, but the public transportation is horrible. The subway is called the MRT, and it is constantly jammed with people….I think worse then subways I had seen in Beijing, China. They need security guards to hold back people from crushing into the overfilled trains.

Pollution is rough…I have blown my nose many times and had black soot in the tissue….walking through construction zones, crammed with too many people and having exhausts from trucks blowing into my face with dirt and sand coming from the backs of their tires.

Tricycles zipping around, loud motorcycles. Police inspection checkpoints into most major stores and malls. The list of what you see on the streets can go on and on.

Yet somehow people stay positive, stay strong. There is a photo I took today of a mother and her daughter across from me on the jeepnee. The girl was so sweet, eating her chips (yea, not the most healthy diets…) and giggling. All the while looking out the window there is traffic, police holding large guns, “barkers” yelling to get customers into the next jeepney. And this mother and daughter calmly and noticeably contently enjoying the time together. The ride was about 30 minutes, and you could see them taking turns sleeping….mom napping when I took the pic, later the daughter leaning into the mother and getting some rest.

I really wonder how I could sleep on a jeepney…..maybe if I grew up in this environment I would be used to it.

TO BE USED TO IT. to be used to living in this day in and day out.

Then others kind of say I am not really seeing the real life. I mean, I can say this is fun and idea-sparking for me….but I can just hop on a plane and come and go when I please. I am not “trapped” in this life every single day.

So many hate the commute between Quezon City and Makati. Quezon City is where the majority of staff for call centers live, and Makati is the main “downtown” for call centers and outsourcing. They can spend up to an hour and a half each way, between buses, traffic, and MRT trains. Thats 3 hours a day…and this is in no way a relaxing commute. When I have taken these trains and buses, its not been as easy as when I’m in New York or Shenzhen, China…..these are so jam packed all day around that I can never get a chance to open my laptop to write some blogs or proposals and emails…..instead I am forced to only try to use my mobile phone to check some emails quickly…..but even then I am afraid it may get stolen if I am showing off my phone too much in the open.

If I had to make that commute each day….man, I can barely handle it once! It would wear me down more then when I was stuck in the daily grind back in New York between 2003 to 2007….I need to do something when I’m traveling….write, read, make logical thinking inside my brain. But this type of commuting seems mind-numbing…..

And am I supposed to support this type of living? Open a call center in Makati, hire workers in Quezon City, and put them in that daily ratrace commute? seems horrible life and why would I want to support that? And to put them behind a cubicle, count their hours, their time management, and bean count their work performance.

There has to be something else, something better……

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